(no subject)

Guppy cooled down a little after his earlier trip to the bar. Chances were that Ray was right, and he had been overreacting. Just because diseases could be converted backwards wouldn't automatically mean that there would be a bar full of smallpox victims.

Chill out, wait until it happens because there's no way you can actually fix it if it happens... it's days like this I consider taking up smoking.

With five days left in A+E, he has a typically rough shift before making a move to his mother's. Whether she'll let him see his sister or not is irrelevant today, he has to work out what's going on.

He rings the bell. And waits. He knows she's in. He knows she's doing it on purpose. He rings it again.

Eventually, she answers.

"What do you want?"

"I want to know what's going on." Guppy says quietly. "Please, just give me a chance to make things right here."

"You can't." But she doesn't close the door. "Come in, Anita's awake."

Not going to turn down a free visit to his sister, Guppy comes in and goes upstairs. Anita greets him with a smile as he picks her up, and giggles as he snuggles his nose into her cheek.

He turns around, and finds his mother crying.

"Mum?" He puts Anita down and moves towards her. "Come on, what is it?"

"She doesn't like me."

Guppy blinks. He wasn't expecting that.

"What do you mean?" he moves towards her again, awkwardly putting his arm around her. She shakes it off.

"You're the only one she's pleased to see. The one she smiles for. The one she stops crying for."

"That's not true." Guppy says gently. "I've seen you with her, she smiles for you too. And she cries for you sometimes when I have her."

"Really?"

"Yes, really." Guppy smiles a little. "Is that why you haven't wanted me around her?"

"No. You just confuse me."

"What do you mean?" The smile is gone, replaced with a frown. His mother moves past him and looks down at Anita, who gives her mother almost as fond a smile as her brother got.

"I started again. I rebuilt my life. I almost had everything I ever wanted." She looks around. "It didn't work out as I planned. I never seemed to have more than two out of three."

"Husband, child, extended family." Guppy says quietly. "But you already had those before. Nothing lasts forever. You can't have expected it would always be that way..."

"I started again." She says again. "You spoiled it." She looks at Anita. "She hates me." Looking around. "So don't expect me to greet you with open arms."

Guppy just stares at her for a moment, then something clicks.

"You've never bonded with her, have you? When you ran at first, it was after Darvesh. But after that, you couldn't quite face coming back, you felt like you didn't know her. You were scared of how I'd feel about you as a mother again. And because you weren't here at the beginning, nobody really expected you to be instantly connected with her. And you're very unhappy, I can tell."

"What are you getting at?"

"I think you might have post-natal depression." Guppy says gently. "Pushing me away because you didn't want to be judged, but getting a nanny because you didn't want to be near Ani either. I understand now, it all makes sense, I can help..."

"Get out." Her voice is tight.

"I'm sorry." Guppy says quietly. "I just want to make things better for you, if I got the wrong end of the stick then fine, we can still work it out..."

"GET OUT!"

"All right! I'm going! Don't shout in front of Ani." Guppy takes a step back, eyes widening as his mother picks up a cup and hurls it at him.

He dodges the cup, but steps back into nothingness.